“I couldn’t call my mother the word mom. I couldn’t pronounce it. There was too much pain and cold that she sowed. I saw how mothers worry about their girls, come to school… And my sister and I were always alone. We felt that our mother had abandoned us, that she was not interested in where we were,” Iryna Shevchenko says about her childhood.
Irina was born into a dysfunctional family: her parents abused alcohol, made moonshine, and brewed drugs at home. Therefore, the childhood of Ira and her older sister passed in constant suffering.
“When they sold something from home, metal or otherwise, they bought alcohol and drank. My home has always inspired cold and hunger. It was a place of constant tears, quarrels, a crowd of strangers drinking and fighting. Many of them were aggressive, some had previously been in prison for murder.
Since childhood, I have had faith that there is a God, but my prayers sounded like this: “God, take us out of this life. We don’t want to live like this anymore. We don’t see any light and hope that something will get better…”
There was often no food at home. Sometimes Iryna was even happy when other alcoholics came to her parents – they brought a snack. In the morning, girls could find canned food or bread on the table.
“I was constantly hungry. When old grandmothers died on the street, we were called to the funeral to scatter flowers. We came with a sad look… But for us, it was an opportunity to eat. Hunger has always accompanied us. It was especially difficult in winter. In the summer, at least berries or apples could be found…”
The situation was getting worse and worse. Dad went to prison, and mom increasingly left home for several days, sometimes without returning.
“There was a quarrel. My husband stole our bike, dad hit him, he fell on the fence and lost an eye. Dad was imprisoned. And mom… She just left. Sometimes she returned, but more often she was drunk.
I couldn’t call her “mother” — that word didn’t go through my throat. It was so painful to see other mothers worried about their children…”
Despite her parents and environment, Ira and her sister tried to live right. They studied well and were respected at school. But the pressure of the environment was heavy.
“I heard everywhere behind my back: ‘These are the children of Man… the same fate will be – drinking, smoking, trading the body.” But we had a sense of dignity.”
Despite the fact that the mother sometimes showed up at home, social services could no longer ignore the situation. When Ira was 14 and her sister was 16, it was time to make a decision.
“I was told to leave classes and go to the city council. In the office of the social service, I was immediately informed: “You can’t live like this. Your case has not been closed for four years — but this is the end. Your sister goes to school, and you go to boarding school.”
It was on that day that Ira met a familiar believing woman — Natalia — a meeting that changed their fate.
“I left the city council and saw Natasha. She walked happy, beautiful, and was so happy with me… I told her everything. And she said, “No, I’ll pick you up. And Vita too.”
She went to the social service, and they understood everything. That’s how we ended up at Natalia’s house. For six months, she drew up documents and became our official guardian.
It was strange to go to bed where it was warm, quiet, where there was a bath and bread, where no one was beating.”
The lives of Ira and her sister began to change. They went to church, they came to know God. Ira graduated from music school, university and master’s degree. Now she works with children and teaches vocals.
“It’s a blessing for me to see children, especially those who need a kind word, warm tea, or just a hug.”
Iryna knew the heart of a loving God.
“I often cry with happiness. And always congratulating someone on their birthday, I wish them to cry out of happiness. Because all the last years I have been crying because of God’s love. He opens doors, makes dreams come true.
Sometimes it seems to me that my life is a fairy tale. I would like to ask: pinch me…”
Remembering what it means to be an abandoned child, Irina recently became the guardian of two girls removed from a dysfunctional family.
“By God’s mercy, Irynka and Darynka are now my girls. Ivanka also often comes with us, who comes for holidays and weekends. We have a warm, cheerful, slightly noisy family.
Our story seems to repeat itself: as Natalia once took me and my sister, so I take these children. I understand their pain well. We cry together, and rejoice, and laugh. They are very good girls, and I am grateful to God for them.”
Iryna is grateful to the Lord for the healing of her heart.
“I know a gentle, caring Heavenly Dad. I once asked God, “Where were you in my bitter childhood?” and He answered, “I wept with you.”
He never leaves, sympathizes with our pain, gives people and happiness. And I dream of giving a beautiful bouquet to everyone who has been on my way. There are dozens of them. Thank God for that!”
Iryna Shevchenko lives in Konotop in the Sumy region with her adopted daughters. She works in the house of culture, teaches children to sing and serves in the children’s ministry of the church.
#ШЛЯХДОБОГА is a media project of the NGO “We Can!” for the #TBNUA channel. It tells the stories of people who, on their life path, faced insurmountable circumstances, difficult challenges of fate, and ultimately found a way out in faith in God.